13 May 2010

i've been duped

Okay, so here's the plan. We're going to come up with some sort of scheme that plays on the desperation of sleep deprived parents. We'll make millions! Who's with me? Oh no, wait. Been done.

I really like sleeping. Back in my single years, I could easily have slept until noon on a daily basis. I used to feel guilty about it, but that's just the way I'm built, so let's move on. Ironically, I took a job as a barista at Starbucks and my regular shift started between 4:45 and 6AM. This did not make me a morning person. I would get off around noon, make my way home, shower off the inevitable scent of coffee that had seeped into my very being, and head straight for bed. I would nap until 2 or 3 and then my day would really begin. Oh, the single life.

Then I married a morning person. I mean who gets up at 8AM? That's crazy talk. I began to feel guilty again and moved my wake up time to 9 or 10. Oh the depravation. We can all see where this is going.

Then I had a baby. Bye-bye, sweet slumber, bye-bye.

I know new moms think they aren't getting enough sleep. And you aren't. But really, it's all relative. The truth is that as a new mom, you at least have the opportunity to nap. Sure, sure, you've got laundry and dishes. But hey, you're a new mom! Milk it. You've got a little fifteen pound excuse to get some rest and have a semi-messy house.

Enter the toddler years. There are no more excuses. And there is a heck of a lot more laundry and dishes and spills and toys (and probably another kid or two thrown into the mix). And those little punks have the audacity to start their days at the first hint of sunlight. This is my life.

Lute used to sleep until the wonderful hour of 7AM. Back to the crazy talk. But I had adjusted. Who knew how welcome that time of day would become? Then that horrible, fateful day rolled around: Daylight Savings Time. Seriously, we aren't farmers. How necessary is all this?

So, in an effort to change Lute's internal clock, we started with foil on the windows. That worked for one day. A day filled with false hope and satisfaction. The next day we were back to the 6:15 wake-up call: "Mammmmmmmmmaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.... the sun is up!" Arghhhh.

Then I came up with the brilliant plan of putting together a special box of toys just for morning time, alone in his room until Mama came to get him. We had a very serious, detailed conversation about how it would all play out. That bought me eight minutes. Time for Plan C.

Several friends suggested a light with a timer on it. When the light goes on, he is free to get up. I googled light timers and night lights and lo and behold! There was a wonderful invention called the Ok to Wake! Night Light, which will further be known as The Big Fat Joke! I am not even going to tell you how much I shelled out for this ridiculously cheap alarm clock that has done absolutely nothing for my child's sleeping and waking habits. He gets the concept, but it's a novelty, a means of torture for every parent of three year old boys.

So, if you can't beat 'em, join 'em. I am a reformed sleepaholic. Or at least I am in rehab. Please excuse me while I go make another pot of coffee.


  1. We taught my 3yo what the number 6 looked like and bought him an alarm clock and told him he couldn't get out of bed until the first number was a 6. We had to cover up the rest of the numbers when he started getting out of bed at 4:56, 1:26 and ridiculous times like that. Good luck!

    Stopping in from SITS.

  2. Thanks for your comment! :)

    I looove my sleep too, and now you have me scared! lol The first 3 months with my son were a nightmare sleep-wise (well, I think that's the case for like 98% of new moms), but when he hit 4 months he started sleeping 10-12 hours a night and it has stayed that way - he's 16 months now. I get my 8 hours (and then some) every night - but now you have me scared that I will lose that as he gets older!!

    But I guess that's kind of moot anyway since I plan to have another baby next year! :)

  3. Oh the days of sleep-- how I miss them. I, too, was a sleepaholic, and now I have a six-month-old... yeah, what's sleep?

  4. BH, don't worry! Mine still sleeps 11 hours a night, it's just not the 11 hours I would choose. Also, got a 6 month old who is so not sleeping though the night, so that throws a wrench in things :)

  5. I had a friend who had her two children trained beautifully...they were allowed to only play alone in their rooms from 6-7 and together from 7-8...bought her 2 hours to sleep and morning chores!

  6. I have an award for you on my blog! Come check it out!! :)

  7. I am so not a morning person. Coffee wakes me up eventually, though ;)

  8. oh man... so, you're saying it doesn't really get better?!?!?! ha! oh no!

    Elliot slept in until 7:40 this morning, and it felt like paradise! My husband just turned to me and said "Where did the morning go?!"


  9. It's been a long time since I had little ones calling my name in the morning, but I still remember getting to a point where having them yell "mom" felt like they were swearing at me.

    It may be a ways off but it will get better. I promise.

  10. Oh, geez. I am just like you! I bought the blackout shades, and they help. I clean up their playroom perfectly and set up the train set every night after they go to bed so that it's there in the morning. I taught my four year old how to turn on the TV, and I make sure it's set to the Disney channel before I crash for the night. Even then... I'm lucky to sleep till seven.


    Stopping by from SITS :)

  11. I can't top the comment before - it really does feel like they are swearing in the morning. Milk it while they can is right. Thankfully my kids are getting a bit older and finally able to understand the value of just a few more minutes of sleep. Hang in there.

    Visiting from SITS>

  12. I love to sleep too and am not a morning person either....And yea, what is what with daylight savings time, I am still screwed up from that.

  13. I am not a morning person. Never have been. My mother even put me in afternoon kindergarten rather than morning because she knew it was going to be next to impossible to get me to school on time. My son is the exact opposite. Actually, he's both a morning person AND a night owl. I can't get him to go to sleep without a fight at night and he's up long before the sun comes up at 6 am. I miss sleeping!

    Happy SITS Day!

    Cheers :-)
    - CoconutPalmDesigns

  14. I've always been a morning person and I even wake up at 4am though lately I get out of bed at around 7am. My kid wake around 8am so I don't have much prob besides he's already six.

    You can probably sleep in the afternoon when your kids are napping, just like you said if you can't beat them join them!

    Dropping by from SITS

  15. When did 7am become a sleep-in? How life changes when you have kids! I've looked at those OK to wake clocks - glad I never bought one!